BHAKTI YOGA - Part 6

The eternal fidelity of a Hindu woman to her husband makes her an ideal of the feminine world. It makes her sublime and lofty. This sublime virtue still runs deep in the heart of hearts of every Hindu woman of India superior to any of the other countries in national integrity and honour. The inspiring force of the home is woman.

The home is the origin and the beginning of every form of social organisation. It is the nursery of the nation. It is the sweet place or centre wherein children are trained for future citizenship. The woman illumines the home through the glory of motherhood. Man is incapable of doing the domestic duties incident upon the rearing up of the children.

Good habits, right conduct, formation of character are created in children spontaneously in a well-regulated home under the personal influence of the mother. The loving kindness and the cultured gentleness of the mother help the children to unfold their native talents and dormant capacities quickly. Children absorb ideas by suggestion and imitation. Early training and impressions are lasting formation of character can be done by efficiently by mothers at home. Therefore, home is the beautiful training ground for the building up of character in children under the personal guidance of the mother.

Women are the backbone or bedrock or the basis for sustaining religion and national strength and prosperity. There is no difference between her and Lakshmi, the Goddess of Beauty, Grace and Prosperity. Manu says, “That woman who does always good, who is efficient in work, sweet in speech, devoted to her Dharmas and service to her husband, is really no human being but a Goddess.” If the mother trains her children on the right lines she is rendering a great service indeed to the nation and the national culture.

Women have got ample opportunities to improve and increase the national health and prosperity. They really build the nation. They can utilise their talents and abilities in making the home the cradle of culture character, personal ability and religious upheaval. It is therefore wrong to say that their life is cramped or stunted by attending to the duties at home and that no scope is given for evolution and freedom. This is a sad mistake indeed! The life of a woman is as noble and serious as that of a man.

There is no doubt of this. It is the women that keep up the life and happiness of the home through their smile, tender affection, sweet speech, charming personality, grace and angelic presence. The home will be a real void without them. It will lose its peculiar charm and beauty without their presence. It will be of great benefit to know what the Great Ones have said about the ideal of conduct and deportment that a woman should try to live up to. Sri Rama instructs Kausalya, his mother, as follows: “To a woman so long as she is alive, the husband is indeed the Lord and God. That woman, who, though noblest of all and given to the practice of vows and fasts, does not look after her husband, will indeed obtain an unmeritorious future. Even if a woman has never bowed to the Gods and has ceased to worship them, she obtains the highest heaven by serving her husband.

A woman should be absorbed in the service of her husband, taking delight in his pleasure and his good. This is the path of the Dharma, known for long ages, revealed in the Vedas, and remembered by the world. There is nothing more cruel for a woman than to desert her husband. To attend upon and to serve one’s husband is no doubt the highest duty of a woman. So long as a woman lives, her husband is her only master.” Then again there is Kanva Rishi’s advice to Sakuntala on the eve of her departure from his Ashram to King Dushyanta’s residence. Kanva Rishi says: “Sakuntala! Serve all your elders.

Though your Lord is angry with you at times, do not go against his wishes. Do not be too much attached in enjoyment. Treat your dependants and co-wives with motherly affection and tenderness. Be an affectionate companion to your sisters-in-law. Be obedient to your mother-in-law. These attributes will make you the true mistress of the house. Otherwise, you will give pain and trouble to the whole family.” It is the duty of the lady of the house to get up before her husband in the early hours of the dawn, take her bath and perform the household work. Tiruvalluvar’s wife shampooed the feet of her husband, slept after her husband and rose up in the morning before he got up from bed. She is regarded as a model woman.

To a lady the husband is indeed the highest ornament of all ornaments. Being separated from him, she, however beautiful, does not shine. The Hindu scriptures say that the wife must be very obedient and that the husband is God to her. Some ignorant persons take advantage of this and exercise undue authority over their wives and keep them under extreme subordination. Is this not a sad mistake? Woman is in no way inferior to man. The home is a co-operative organisation. It flourishes on the principle of division of labour.

The husband should not think that he is superior to his wife, simply because he is the earning member of the family. Women have a definite field of their own. They are mothers of the house. The extraordinary abilities and intellectual attainments, and the magnetic personality of the modern women are a standing monument to their undoubted equality with men. The personal influence of women at home is essential to unify the various interests of the family. It is women alone who can rear and nurse children. Hindu wives are queens in their own homes. The husbands should treat their wives with intense love and respect.

They should be regarded as equals in all respects and be held in the light of partners in life. Manu says, “The householder should first serve his relatives and dependants with food and then take the remaining food along with his wife,” hinting thereby at the position of equal footing on which she is to be treated. If a man earns and the wife stays at home, it does not mean that the woman is a parasite and a slave. She is indeed the builder of the nation. Verily, women exercise an authority over their husbands through their love, tenderness, affection, grace, beauty, selfless service and fidelity, purity and self-abnegation.

From - Yoga in Daily life